The radish doctor

A RADISH that once lived in a garden thought really high of his knowledge and lost little chance to dive into all sorts of different sciences. Yet, he was also lazy and would never look up anything in a book, only to advise others as he felt fit every time someone asked him about something.

 

 

 

 

One day, he decided to dive into the toughest science of all, that is, medicine. “I have no need of books”, he proudly announced to the other fruit and vegetables and went to the nearest city to buy a stethoscope, a thermometer and a doctor’s white coat so as to resemble a doctor. He then bought chairs, a desk, a bench, as well as all the necessary equipment with which to start his own doctor’s office in the garden. After setting everything up, he placed a sign with big letters right outside his front door: “Doctor Radish’s health clinic for fruit and vegetables”.

The fruit and vegetables of the garden found it very strange to read the sign, as they had never thought of the radish as a doctor until that time. At first, they avoided visiting him, only to ask him for advice on small problems they had, every time they saw him walking in the garden.

One day, however, the cherry plum that had made a bad habit out of crying nonstop all this time happened to dry up. His good friend, the onion, felt very worried, taking him for sick, and so he took him straight to the radish.

“It’s as simple as this”, the radish told the onion with a serious look on his face. “You only need to scratch in front of your friend, and the cherry plum will start crying again like before”. The onion got even more confused when the doctor gave him a big, rough brush and a piece of soap. As soon as he used it to rub himself, however, the cherry plum magically burst into tears once more.

“He’s a truly great scientist”, the onion told the other fruit and vegetables the next day and explained to them how the radish managed to heal the cherry plum. So, they got persuaded, thinking of the radish as a great doctor with degrees from the greatest universities.

Yet, as the radish was very cunning, the more the fruit and vegetables flocked to his clinic to find cure, the more he used big talk to fool them, claiming that they suffered from weird diseases with strange, difficult to pronounce names that only he could properly spell. And as they knew little about medicine, they kept visiting him for his medical advice and telling their friends about him. Within only a few days he had been visited by so many clients that he eventually turned his clinic into a hospital with beds, nurses and departments for each and every disease.

“That’s enough!”, the studious apple that had read every book on the bookshelf told the other fruit and vegetables one day. He, then, grabbed those concerning medicine and paid a visit to the radish’s hospital, outside of which all sorts of “patients” waited for hours to be treated. After talking to each and every one of them, he managed to persuade them that the diseases the radish claimed they were suffering from were not written anywhere or in any book. They, then, realized the radish had fooled them and angrily asked him to apologize.

After being framed as an impostor, the radish got very ashamed, as the claim he had come up with imaginary illnesses had proven itself true. He, then, admitted in front of the apple that he was neither a doctor, nor had he ever read a book in his life about medicine before in his life. The other fruit and vegetables burst into laughter as he hanged his white coat and left in shame.

“You know what they say, an apple a day keeps the doctor away”, they all laughed at each other, and from that day decided never to pay attention to medical advice from any clueless fruit or vegetable, simply because they claim to know.